A blog about anything and everything that inspires me.
Saturday, 6 December 2014
What Is My Purpose In Life?
Do you ever wonder why things happen the way they do? Do you ever
wonder why you're here, what your purpose is in life? Do you ever
wonder if you'remeant
to be here? Over the last few months, I've been giving these
questions quite a bit of thought.
August, my family doctor retired, which meant my mom and I had to
find a new one. We did, and we picked up our medical charts to take
to this new doctor. Between our last appointment with our former
doctor, and our first appointment with our new doctor, we had some
time to look through our medical
charts. In doing so, we found out something neither one of us knew
about me. I was still born.
always known that my first few days of life had been touch-and-go.
My mom had an appointment for a non-stress test, and the doctors
discovered I was in distress. So, as a result, I was born a month
premature. I've also known that I had stopped breathing a couple of
days into life, and I spent 15 days in NICU, as well as that my development was slowed in part due to being
also aware that I didn't speak in full sentences until I was 4; I'm
making up for lost time, lol.) However,
I did not know that I actually hadn't been alive when I was born.
I was born, I was clinically dead.
knowledge sparked a few questions, the most prominent one being, "Why
did I survive?" Why
did I come back to life? Am
I meant to be here? Why? What is it that I am supposed to accomplish
in however many years I'm granted? Whose lives am I supposed to
enrich, if any?
have many acquaintances and people I see fairly regularly, but I have
very few close friends. It's been that way since I was a child,
primarily because I choose who I want to hang out with. The
people I make time to meet with are, in many ways, very special to
spite of this, there have been people who have come into my life I
feel like I was fated to meet for various reasons. A couple of
me back into playing my guitar fairly regularly, another few have,
and continue to be, my inspiration for my trilogy and other novels,
and one other reminded me how much I used to love playing board
games. There are people with whom I feel the most at home, and the
most free to be me. They are the people who have enriched my life. If
they have enriched my life in their own big and little ways, have I
done the same for them? What is my purpose in their lives? Am I
fulfilling that purpose?
who really know me, know that I can sometimes be completely off the
wall. I am really not
so different from say, Peter Pan, in that I am a kid at heart and
always have been. My difficult birth has provided me with a humourous
response of, "I didn't get enough oxygen as a baby" when
people look at me as though I've got two extra heads. On occasion,
that response becomes, "Ain't you glad I survived?" when
those same people can only smile and shake their heads at me. In
spite of this, it's something I have struggled
to grapple with since August, and I suspect that I will continue to
with it forever.
did I survive on my birthday when thousands of other babies in the
same predicament may not have? What makes me so special? Why me?
thinking about it, I've come to realize that everyone has a purpose,
something they are meant to do. Everyone is meant to touch someone,
everyone is meant to influence someone else. Everyone has a path to
travel, even if that path is not clear, and those paths intersect for
a reason – some bad, some good.
this in mind, everyone who has crossed my path has meant to. To
who have made me feel at home, I am forever grateful. To everyone to
has crossed paths with me, thank you, for you have made my life what
never reaches home, but wherever friendly paths intersect the whole
world looks like home for a time." ~ Hermann Hesse